A particularly funny Quora question and answer.
The question: Why … are Americans speaking Medieval English when the rest of the world moved on 400 years ago?
This question is merely silly rather than funny. The answer, from Ben Waggoner, is funny:
Ic wat not what thou sayst, thou cokkes-combe. We speketh the richt goode Englische tonge in America, thou jacke-foole, thou dodemused globbe, thou blont-werker, thou mobard mid shrunken coilons.
And this is why I follow Ben Waggoner on Quora.
We speken the righte goode English. For the luve of heafon, knowestu not that -th is only used with he/sche/itte? We speken, ye alle speken, they speken. He speketh, thu spekest, I speke.