The Worst Michelin-Starred Restaurant?

Here is a hilarious review of a restaurant in Lecce, Italy, called Bros.

Bros., Lecce: We Eat at The Worst Michelin Starred Restaurant, Ever

There is something to be said about a truly disastrous meal, a meal forever indelible in your memory because it’s so uniquely bad, it can only be deemed an achievement. The sort of meal where everyone involved was definitely trying to do something; it’s just not entirely clear what.

I’m not talking about a meal that’s poorly cooked, or a server who might be planning your murder—that sort of thing happens in the fat lump of the bell curve of bad. Instead, I’m talking about the long tail stuff – the sort of meals that make you feel as though the fabric of reality is unraveling. …

At some point, the only way to regard that sort of experience—without going mad—is as some sort of community improv theater. You sit in the audience, shouting suggestions like, “A restaurant!” and “Eating something that resembles food” and “The exchange of money for goods, and in this instance the goods are a goddamn meal!” All of these suggestion go completely ignored.

You should most definitely click through and read the whole thing.

Keeping in mind that this experience lasted 4.5 hours and cost hundreds of dollars per person, what is the point where you would have stood up and walked out without paying? I know when that moment would have come for me — I mean, if I hadn’t walked out long before, the moment that would unquestionably have been the last straw.

You may have fun reading this post with that in mind so you can pick that moment for you. I’m guessing we’ll all pick the same exact moment, and I’m curious to see if that’s true.

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13 thoughts on “The Worst Michelin-Starred Restaurant?”

  1. I have, Mary Beth! I googled the restaurant this morning and the reviewer’s Twitter thread popped up, among other things. It’s quite something!

    I was sort of ignoring the part about possibly endangering the lives of the diners and focusing on the remarkable courses. I grant, if deadly items (or empty plates) appeared, I would probably not have made it to the mouth with the foam! But whoa, I would have been out of there when that turned up.

  2. Oh, ugh. Going to a Restaurant called Bros., with no clientele, is kinda asking for trouble. But not this much trouble. The single fish cracker picture is what got me. The lip cup is gross, I ageee.

  3. Wow, that reply is something. I’m pretty sure he’s saying that everybody and their dog can make good food, but it takes an artist to make terrible food and get you to pay 200 euros a head for it. On consideration, he has a point, but I would preface the “artist” part with the word “con”…

  4. I like to think I would have walked out when it became clear that the servers did not consider it their job to explain anything.
    If not, the rancid cheese might have done it. That’s before the foam in the mouth, right?

  5. For me it would have been a quick about-face as soon as I saw the bunker. That space with music blaring would destroy my appetite. It’s clear the writer had to do the review so stayed for the whole awful experience.

  6. I – um – no. I’d rather eat at one of the hole-in-the-wall establishments here in my hometown, thanks. At least they serve real food on actual plates. Heck, the *gas station Indian place* down the street from us has literally won state-wide awards, so why go to a foreign country to be tortured by a non-existent menu and unhelpful waitstaff?

  7. Probably if I’d entered at all, I’d have left when I got to the bunker and the music.
    This will probably have an impact on how seriously people take Michelin ratings. If I traveled and it mattered, I’d certainly be less trusting of them.

  8. Elaine, the bunker in and of itself probably wouldn’t have made me walk out. But apparently it was baking hot in there, and that very well might have.

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