Rachel Neumeier

Fantasy and Young Adult Fantasy Author


Okay, this is too weird for fiction

If an author put this in a novel, wouldn’t you think it was too weird to be believable?

I mean . . . really?

Also, this:

Another recurring feature in accounts of the house is that it has “no door”, or even that it can only be viewed from a distance and disappears when you approach — one account describes the writer and his friends becoming groggy and disoriented, finding themselves on an unexpected street, defeated by some kind of magical barrier

Suuuure. But if I put something as unbelievable as this in a novel, I’d certainly be happy to have this “can’t get to it” thing be true as well, because why not?

Now, what happens if you actually enter this house?

a) You find yourself inside an undersea palace where the courtiers are moray eels and the soldiers are sharks and the Grand Vizier is a giant manta ray. Luckily you can breathe just fine — maybe you’re transformed into a mer-person?

b) You find yourself inside a mad scientist’s house. He is working on ways to communicate with octopuses as part of a peculiar plan to take over the world.

c) You discover this is actually a base for an alien invasion. The aliens are (obviously) cephalopods. They consider it dishonorable to hide their presence from a prospective conquest, but they don’t feel it’s necessary to make sure their future slaves actually believe in them until it’s too late for effective resistance.

d) Oh come on, obviously this is a temple to the Old Ones. Any day now, Cthulhu is going to rise.

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